Monday, November 10, 2008

Sheep and Cows

If you gross out easily, you might want to skip this one:

When I lived in Ephraim, some of my bestest friends and neighbors had a sheep ranch or farm or whatever you call it. The first spring I lived there, they told me that they were going to be very busy during the upcoming months while all the lambs were being born (“lambing”) and then “docking” (cutting off the tail and castrating the males.) During the course of the conversation I became aware of something that horrified me: the men castrated the sheep with their teeth.

Yeah, see, you read that right and I’m not even joking. I didn’t believe them for a while and then one of my students came running into class the next week telling me how they had seen a man castrate a lamb with his teeth. I believed them then. I was telling one of my brothers about it and he said that it was impossible and that they were pulling my leg. What’s a sister to do? I sent my camera with the guys and they filled up a roll of film doing the deed. I processed it at Walmart, nearly fainted when I looked at the photos, told myself I would never kiss a man who had done that, and tucked the photos into an Easter card for my brother.

Muah ha ha ha ha. They believed me then!

A few months ago some of the Young Women at church were asking me about this because one of them had heard me talking about it with someone else and they wanted to know “the truth”. I was calmly and matter of factly telling them about it when out walks the whole Bishopric. Despite my best judgment I continued telling them about it and when all was said and done, the Bishop says, “I don’t believe it. There’s no way people do that.” Counselor #1 looks over and says, “Yeah they do, I’ve done it.” Girls scream, I laugh hysterically and the Bishop found out a few new things.

A couple of weeks ago, Mike Rowe showcased this little event on “Dirty Jobs”. I couldn’t even stand to watch it, ugh.

The University here has quite a few agriculture programs—and there are many animals surrounding one side of campus. I kept thinking that the cows in this one particular field looked funny—with big rings/circles on their sides. I kept driving past them wondering what the heck that was about and I finally asked this same Bishopric member who had done the teeth castrating. He told me that these cows (LIVING BREATHING COWS) were cut open and they have this circle/ring/rubber things put into their side so that students can REACH INTO THE LIVE COW to feel their stomachs digesting. Great. Several of the Young Women piped up saying that they had felt inside the live cows on field trips. Super great. Now I can’t drive home without passing the grazing cows with holes in them and wanting to puke.

I can’t think of any good reason why I should continue to eat meat when these things gross me out so much, but I just can’t not eat meat.


J & K Shapiro said...

WHOA. Is there a reason for this? Is it a right of passage?

Jessica Lillywhite said...

Haha good old Dad...It's so disgusting but it's also hilarious.