Most of Family Night was normalish ...but here's how it went down when we went to have lesson time:
Ben: Tonight's lesson is on...
James: No! I want to be the lesson tonight!
Ben: Ok, teach us a lesson.
James: Wait a minute, I'm thinking......(30 seconds later) Tonight the lesson is about going to the Mall. First, we go to the mall. Then we eat at Chick fil A. Then we get a balloon. Then I need ice cream. And that's how you go to the mall. (Disclaimer: we go to the mall MAYBE once a month to walk around and while it does usually lead to Chick Fil A, the other parts I have no idea what he is making up.)
(Ben and Carolyn praise James and try their very hardest not to rupture internal organs from holding in laughter.)
James: Ok, Daddy, now it's your turn to teach us a lesson.
Ben: Ok, tonight's lesson is on the Priesthood. (Teaches a short and simple lesson, highlights blessings for when you are sick... follows up with a few questions.) So James, what can Daddy do to help you when you are not feeling well?
James: You can give me Jelly Beans.
(Ben and Carolyn smile again, sigh, and reteach.)
James: Mommy, now it's your turn to teach us a lesson.
Carolyn: Ok, um, tonight's lesson is on...
Carolyn: Ok, sure, Baptism is when .....(teach previous lesson on Baptism. Then I decided to expand a bit...) After you are baptized, you will also get a very special blessing so that you can have the Holy Ghost be with you all the time...Then
James: (Crying) I don't want a ghost! I don't want a Ghost! I'm scared!
Carolyn: It's not a scary ghost, it's actually a help...
James: No ghosts at all! I don't want any help! (Crying goes to wailing.)
Ben: It's a good thing, James, it's more like a spirit...
James: NO! I don't want it! (Wailing)
Carolyn: Ok, who wants treats?
Yeah, that stopped the mayhem.
And that, my friends, is a model Family Night. (Snort) They're probably going to ask us to do videos for the church and everything. (Crying from so much laughing) The only thing missing was Jello.